July 22, 2009

Behind the Stone Face

I know a girl who knew many men in her life .. as a result of her exposure and life style

some were freinds

some were loving her madly .. but unfortunately ... from one side

and few she felt they worth trying with ... but end up with a complete rejection from her side

all that is practicaly normal .. during the course of our life .. we kow people that we categorize under the previous categories

but this is not why i am writing this ..

the pattern i have spotted through her stories has attracted my attention... :

"She mainly attracts men with brain ... with power ... with strong existence in life ... those who are loved and feared and greatly respected"

and behind their stone face .. she could find the most tender loving heart .. and transform the rocky feelings into a stream of water to the extent of writing her poetry .. and make them melt in an endless status of adoration and lust that can never be satisfied but with her

Man .. this simple yet complicated creature

what can ever touch the heart of a man with the previously mentioned qualities??
that is the question that i asked her several times, and i got nothing but a puzzeled smile from her side!!!

as i thought a lot about this matter .. and through reading the pattern of her stories and knowing her personality .. i could reach a one line rule

be simple .. be passionate .. be natural .. and above all be true .. and the most complicated Man will b yours

a complicated man .. is searching for shelter from the weight of his restless mind and wandering soul ... a shelter fromt he daily fights .. from the fakness that he can easily read through the others eyes

he is seeking his mother in you

a mother who is simple and take anything easily and lightly and make the most complicated issue going

a mother whose love is endless .. and whose passion about the silliest thing her son do is enormous .. making him feel as if he is the best man on earth

a mother who is so natural without any fake feelings .. and with a look like flowers showered with morning dew ... reading his most hidden thoughts .. and reach deep his fears .. washing them away

a mother who is true in everything she does .. and beleives in everything he does

mystery of life ... revealed

My Strange Idea for Today

I am a Mother

July 15, 2009

Reality Vs My Stubborn Mind

I woke up this morning with a feeling that i have neutralized a long time ago ..

neutralized out of my increasing sense of reality .. i didn't chose to grow up .. as a Friend of mine told me the past week .. i am just overwhelmed with loads of critical events that take place in my life.

back to the feeling

i have always been complaining that i don't have a definite feeling of reality .. nor a definite feeling of a world of my own creation... i am in between

for a while i sunk my mind in that sweet soft world of mine .. my master piece of all time ... a world of my own creation .. where i live, breath, feel, love... and it did me really well .. i became the woman i wish .. and all my feelings poured out of my mind in the form of stories that enchanted others

and then reality struck me with cold winds of duty .. so i have to pack and leave my world ... but with a promise to be back once in a while .. and it happened .. every now and then .. i go visit my other life .. live for a while .. then go back to reality .. until

reality consumed my time and mind .. and i lost all contact with my world

i was confused .. but i adapted fast .. for i didn't had the luxury to lay down and think ... i have only one path ... act and never react .. others fate was hanged in my neck .. so i have to move .. and put back my armor, sword and shield .. call for all my forces .. and fight for the good of others and myself

weary of fights ..

longing for my true self ... an enchantress from other time

but blinded with duty .. deafened with calls of help

so i had to keep fighting mercilessly, fiercely, and fearlessly

until yesterday....

i felt it coming, but didn't believe it ... after all this time .. the gates of my world are open again .. glowing under the morning soft rays of lights ..

i slept and woke up

not knowing where i am

not knowing who i am

try to figure out

do things out of habit .. not out of realization

i feel my world again

i listen to the angelic music .. even the devilish cries of shadows beneath earth

i smell the flowers of the spring .. and even the blood of the fights between good and evil

i hear the melodies of harps played by nymphs of forests ... and even the clings of verocious swords searching for blood

i touch the soft warm clouds with my pinkish toes .. and even the hard rocks beneath the stream of the river

i am back


not fully

still on the edge of two worlds

back again to point zero

my stubborn dreamy mind is pushing me away from reality

and reality is pulling me under calls of duty

to which i will bend ... to which i will belong ... in this critical time ?

My Strange Idea for Today

Defensive Mechanism .. The Runaway ME

July 08, 2009

Quotes about MEN

Power does not corrupt men; fools, however, if they get into a position of power, corrupt power. ~ George Bernard Shaw

Passion makes idiots of the cleverest men, and makes the biggest idiots clever. ~ Francois de La Rochefoucauld

All men’s miseries derive from not being able to sit in a quiet room alone. ~ Blaise Pascal

God made woman beautiful and foolish; beautiful, that man might love her; and foolish, that she might love him. ~ Unknown

Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless, and cannot. ~ Oscar Wilde

A man may conquer a million men in battle but one who conquers himself is, indeed, the greatest of conquerors. ~ Buddha

Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. ~ Billy Crystal

Men play the game; women know the score. ~ Roger Woddis

When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself. ~ Louis Nizer

Few men have been admired of their familiars. ~ Michel de Montaigne

Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men. ~ Kin Hubbard

If it’s true that men are such beasts, this must account for the fact that most women are animal lovers. ~ Doris Day

All men [are] of one metal, but not in one mold. ~ John Lyly

The greatest truths are the simplest, and so are the greatest men. ~ Julius Charles Hare

If you want anything said, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman. ~ Margaret Thatcher

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age. ~ Robert Frost

The desire of excessive power caused the angels to fall; the desire of knowledge caused men to fall. ~ Francis Bacon

Priests are not men of the world; it is not intended that they should be; and a University training is the one best adapted to prevent their becoming so. ~ Samuel Butler

Men are only as great as they are kind. ~ Elbert Hubbard

Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn’t seem to crack. Women treat it like glass and it goes to pieces. ~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change. ~ Confucius

In the long run, men hit only what they aim at. Therefore, they had better aim at something high. ~ Henry David Thoreau

It is a fact often observed, that men have written good verses under the inspiration of passion, who cannot write well under other circumstances. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

My Strange Idea for today
and they call women complicated lol :D:D

July 01, 2009

From within

today, while i was gong home, the taxi driver suddenly started to shout pointing to a car ... saying "chinese... chinese"

and then he started to complain about the flow of chinese and korean cars .. and his wishes to have an egyptian car to be proud of

he talked about the youth who wish to work ,,, and can do cars even better than this one,,, but they are just waiting for the chance

all of this is normal .. and many people agree with this man

but i don't ...

the problem in our country is that we are always waiting for someone to draw us the way and then we follow it ... ignoring our inner force .. and hiding our courage

i wonder why not a bunch of Friends start on a small project ... even if it means to work with their own hands ??? some do .. but the majority is still waiting for someone to push them forward

this is how we were raised .. and this is how we will never be but a developing country

my strange idea for today
fly with me

June 29, 2009

Welcoming Pinky

She is beautiful
she is little
She is lovely
She keeps me company all the time, home, work, wherever
She helps me get creative whenever i wish

Welcom Sweet Pinky ... you really brighten my life

My Strange Idea for Today
I love Pinky

June 28, 2009

The Most Beautiful of Creatures

Quotes about Women:

Sure God created man before woman. But then you always make a rough draft before the final masterpiece. ~Author Unknown

A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon. ~Arnold Haultain

Women are always beautiful. ~Ville Valo

Curve: The loveliest distance between two points. ~Mae West

The two women exchanged the kind of glance women use when no knife is handy. ~Ellery Queen

Next to the wound, what women make best is the bandage. ~Jules Barbey d'Aurevilly

The rarest thing in the world is a woman who is pleased with photographs of herself. ~Elizabeth Metcalf

Women get the last word in every argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. ~Author Unknown

Whether they give or refuse, it delights women just the same to have been asked. ~Ovid

Women really do rule the world. They just haven't figured it out yet. When they do, and they will, we're all in big big trouble. ~"Doctor Leon," drleons.com

Men who don't like girls with brains don't like girls. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

Women keep a special corner of their hearts for sins they have never committed. ~Cornelia Otis Skinner

Lovely female shapes are terrible complicators of the difficulties and dangers of this earthly life, especially for their owners. ~George du Maurier

Every woman is wrong until she cries, and then she is right - instantly. ~Sam Slick (Thomas Chandler Haliburton)

I have an idea that the phrase "weaker sex" was coined by some woman to disarm some man she was preparing to overwhelm. ~Ogden Nash

Be to her virtues very kind,
Be to her faults a little blind.
~Matthew Prior

They may talk of a comet, or a burning mountain, or some such bagatelle; but to me a modest woman, dressed out in all her finery, is the most tremendous object of the whole creation. ~Oliver Goldsmith

It upsets women to be, or not to be, stared at hungrily. ~Mignon McLaughlin,The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

Women are never stronger than when they arm themselves with their weakness. ~Marie de Vichy-Chamrond, Marquise du Deffand, Letters to Voltaire

Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat. ~Oscar Wilde

It is only rarely that one can see in a little boy the promise of a man, but one can almost always see in a little girl the threat of a woman. ~Alexandre Dumas, fils

Women are in league with each other, a secret conspiracy of hearts and pheromones. ~Camille Paglia

When I glimpse the backs of women's knees I seem to hear the first movement of Beethoven's Pastoral Symphony. ~Author Unknown

If a girl looks swell when she meets you, who gives a damn if she's late? Nobody. ~J.D. Salinger, Catcher in the Rye

No woman wants to see herself too clearly. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

A man gives many question marks, however, a woman is a whole mystery. ~Diana Stürm

In passing, also, I would like to say that the first time Adam had a chance he laid the blame on woman. ~Nancy Astor, My Two Countries

Men at most differ as Heaven and Earth, but women, worst and best, as Heaven and Hell. ~Alfred Lord Tennyson

I would rather trust a woman's instinct than a man's reason. ~Stanley Baldwin

Men look at themselves in mirrors. Women look for themselves. ~Elissa Melamed

A woman's whole life is a history of the affections. ~Washington Irving

Women who make men talk better than they are accustomed to are always popular. ~E.V. Lucas

A man is as good as he has to be, and a woman is as bad as she dares. ~Elbert Hubbard

What men desire is a virgin who is a whore. ~Edward Dahlbert

A woman should be an illusion. ~Ian Fleming

There are three things men can do with women: love them, suffer for them, or turn them into literature. ~Stephen Stills

A woman who cannot be ugly is not beautiful. ~Karl Kraus (i love this one)

Once a woman has given you her heart, you can never get rid of the rest of her. ~John Vanbrugh, The Relapse, 1696

Women have very little idea of how much men hate them. ~Germaine Greer

Do you not know I am a woman? when I think, I must speak. ~William Shakespeare, As You Like It

To get to a woman's heart, a man must first use his own. ~Mike Dobbertin, quoted in A 5th Portion of Chicken Soup for the Soul

Nature has given women so much power that the law has very wisely given them little. ~Samuel Johnson

Women speak two languages - one of which is verbal. ~William Shakespeare

Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more. ~James Thurber

I hate women because they always know where things are. ~Voltaire

Good-looking girls break hearts, and goodhearted girls mend them. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue. ~Hermione Gingold

Women always worry about the things that men forget; men always worry about the things women remember. ~Author Unknown

My Strange Idea for the Day
Women are Life

June 26, 2009

The Truth about EROS

for those who don't know .. Eros is the Greek name of Cupid .. the son of Aphrodite or Venus .. the god of sensual love who was represented as a little cherub with wings, bow and arrows

until a while ago i thought that eros send love to the hearts of lover...

i was wrong

eros send lust .. and let the bodies burn with crazy desire .. to the extent of dying due to the urge that possess the body, soul and mind

yet.. i was also wrong

cause currently i am reading a book about the love life of the ancient greeks

on the first chapters of this book .. the writer was describing with simple words what eros really means

he is not only the one who unites souls
he isnot only the one who burns bodies with lust
he is not only the one who occupies ones mind with love thoughts

he is all that ... he is the symbole of the complete love

the love that we taste with our bodies, feel with our souls, and understand with our mind

Love.. What is Love??
we claim that we know love.. that we tasted love.. that we understand the core or the essence of love

but the truth is.. we only touched the surface of a deep ocean called love

a deep ocean in which all three holy constituents of our humanity integrates

the body
the soul
and the mind

now thinking of this .. have u ever known love?

My strange idea for today
Body to Body
Soul to Soul
Mind to Mind
Coming soon

June 23, 2009

My Love Base and Style .. all about passion

Your Love is Based on Passion

When you're in love, you're brimming with emotions and desire.

For you, love can be a crazy frenzy - but somehow it all makes sense.

Love is the most important thing to you. You are capable of doing anything for love.

(This makes you very lovable... but also a little scary!)

Why your love can last: You've got the true attraction, bond, and euphoria to make it happen.

Why your love can fail: Love isn't something you really think through. Your roller coaster relationships sometimes end on a terrifying note.

Your Love Style is Eros

For you, love is all about the passion!

And chances are, you're currently in love.

You have a strong physical response to love...

And you are great at committing

(As long as the person makes your toes curl!)

June 08, 2009

The Life Cycle

it is hard to believe reality ... even if it is crystal clear in front of your eyes

beware.. the one who smiles .. walks.. jokes.. work.. live.. is not what she really seems

there is a lot under the skin ... there is an unstable soul... keep changing from one phase to the other ... from the first day light ... until the darkness of the night

and the next day ... start over again

a mix between runaway bride .. and the first fifty dates

they are hardly combined in one personality ... but it happens .. like any unusual thing i am experiencing

someone who cannot be committed to anything in her life even religion; and at the same time has memory problem, in terms of forgetting , and being unable to organize well the different events of life .. past, present, and vision from the future .. interfere together .. and i am in the middle confused

have no shore

lost ship with no shore

i went to the sea asking him to save me

"draw my fears

suck my tears

lock my memories inside your waves"

my strange idea for today

who am i?

April 29, 2009

Sadness Strike

disappointing others became my favorite sport these days

and i hardly can seem to do anything right

i lost my compass of life.. or - which is more accurate - i don't have one on the first place

lets go back with my memory to remember when i ever had one .. when i ever know what to do with my life .. when i ever did something for myself .. when i ever know who i am .. when i found my path .. !!!

answer is : NEVER

and because of that ... i suffer ... and make those who are around me suffer too

and because i am a self centered person i hardly can see where my blindness leads me

i only see my pain

consumed by my anger i became senseless .. and ill considerate of what others may feel .. depending heavily on a credit that i didn't built .. and that others have to consider my psychological problems

i feel like an angry elephant who is destroying every beautiful thing on his path without noticing .. just when i was faced with high wall that cannot be passed i looked behind ... and i started to see .. the destruction i made

but ... is it too late to make it up?

i broke many things .. in many people ..

precious things

things that even if they were repaired ... they are already cracked .. and the marks can never be healed

i have a problem

and i refuse to see it

and cause of it i lost precious people... who can never be replaced


i can see sadness on their faces

sadness i caused

i .. the one who think she is the victim of the world ... but i end up to be the executor of beautiful feelings


forgive me Racha for Failing you

forgive me Mai for not standing when i should

and you MOMO .. forgive me for hurting you deeply when u never deserved it


GOD forgive me .. i am not bad.. i am just ....... angry .. and ......................................... Blind

please help me to release this anger .. help me to see the sun .. and restore what remains of me


April 08, 2009

The FORCES working in NATURE

Currently i am reading an amazing book called "Sophie's World by Jostein Gaarder"...

The book is presenting the History of Philosophy, in the form of a beautiful Novel... explaining the very hard to explain philosophical questions, philosophers, and terms in a a very very very simple way.

But i am not here to talk about the book... but to tell about something that attracted my attention and i thought of sharing it with you - my readers and fellow bloggers.

The first chapters are talking about how the different philosophers tried to explain the existence, and the processes of nature... away from Myth and l
egends of elders... and that was done by studying the nature itself

Away from all the complicated theories about existence... i want to share one theory with you... the theory of

He suggested that all beings consist of four elements in various proportions ... those elements are: Water, Air
, Fire, and Earth...

Wat was actually interesting are the forces that work on these elements to create and end life
those forces are: LOVE ????????????? and Strife

Love, the force that binds elements of nature together

Strife, is the force that separate elements of nature from each other

Love?.... love !!!.... LOVEEEEEE
oh god!

I dont beleive in love... i only beleive in its destructive impact... and now i see this
love is the force that creates life

Love in both its relative and absolute meanings .. is life

Life evolves around love

Now you know how confused i am

My Strange Idea for Today

March 14, 2009

|||||||||| Searching for Answers Aborted ||||||||||

I am giving up searching for cosmic complicated answers for my unusual questions... and try to be satisfied with the simple ones.

but i still would love to compare between simple answers and cosmic unusual ones

1) why those men who get to know me.. fall in love with me.. lust me.. and cannot stay away from me!!

unusual answer: cause i am the reincarnation of an ancient goddess of love, sexuality and magic

simple answer: cause i am a woman and that is it, men has no reason to be attracted to women, that is the way their system goes.

a goddess is a woman in the inside and outside, so simple answer is in a way or another a simple interpretation to the unusual one .. but still men has something in their mind that make them sence the femininity of the woman in front of them, no matter how tough she tried to seem... the bless of eve shows

2)what is death?

unusual answer: the transfer from one status to another, from the material to the spiritual existence while living in another dimension that has a transparent wall from which the dead are able to watch us... moreover death gives the soul a very high ability to transmit worries and guidance to the beloved ones.. so it is an enhancement in ones senses after all

simple answer: the body stop functioning and the person stop existing

mmm no there is a difference between those two answers, the first one is much more optimistic lol .. and the second is dark and sad ... read between lines

3) does love really exist?

unusual answer: love is a status of attraction and creation of physical and spiritual bond and responsibilities between two existing entities; those entities can or cannot be of the same genre, they can be two humans, a human and an animal, or a human and a unliving thing like a book or a house or a car... and as we can see human is the key word, cause simply they created that term .. and their life evolves around it since the dawn of time.

Simple answer: no

that was too simple :) but why they are contradicting !!! one says yes, and one says no !!!
i think the reason is on how we look at the word love; with its absolute meaning, or relative one!!
i cannot tell which is right, although both are mine ..

4)how do i perceive my relation with nature?

unusual answer: swim naked, stand naked feeling the morning breezes or under the rain, lay naked on the green grass and flower petals...

simple answer: nature nurture my senses

finally a similarity here, we feel through our bodies.. that is why touching is a very important mean to create bonds between two persons... we feel unmaterialistic things with our mind, and we feel materialistic things with our body... and since nature in its core is material existin things, so our body is the best tool to feel it and nurture our senses with its hidden magic.

5) one final question... why everytime i think i find the path .. i loose it? why everytime i think i found happiness.. it disappears ?

unusual answer: Fate.. we never know what is coming

simple answer: Fate... we never know what is coming

No comment on that

My Strange Idea for Today

I want to work in a radio station in a spiritual and self help program!!!... do i fit?